Women want security. What does that mean in man speak? Well, I will tell it to you plainly. When a girl or woman feels insecure, she begins to act in unpredictable and odd ways. Unfortunately, the standard for normal behavior has become so perverted among women that even normal women sometimes imitate abnormal behavior thinking it is the way she should behave.
A girl needs to know that her father will protect her, and provide what she needs. She does not need to feel like he will supply her every want, which would make her insecure- not knowing the boundary. When a girl is not needy she will not chase boys at an early age, and will be more confident in her relationships with boys who are her peers. She will be able to spot the jerks because they do not measure up to what her dad has taught her she is worthy of. She will be confident in herself and not need a boy to fill the void left by an inattentive or absent father. She will hold boys to their promises, expecting them to be like her father. Much of this behavior will be unconscious- she will not think "he has to be like my father." This is the best way to start out life for a female. As John Meyer's song goes, "fathers be good to your daughters, daughters will love like you do."
When a woman leaves her home and becomes independent she becomes vulnerable and she knows it. She is a target for predators, scam artists, and at the mercy of the judgments and power of others, both male and female. She is trying to kill her dinner and drag it home- so to speak. While feminists want women to feel empowered when doing this, the truth is she knows this is not ideal. Can she do it? Sure she can. But she knows she has a higher calling. Women who swallow feminism often find this annoying reality offensive, whether they are reacting to their own feelings or the ideas of others. This is why you see feminist kool-aid drinkers who are always angry. They cannot let the issue alone nor can they accept it, so they lash out in all directions. When a woman has a child she becomes even more vulnerable. She is heavily invested in this child and its needs become her needs. Its (in) security becomes her (in)security.
So what is a man to do? He is to earn her trust and keep it. A man, who looks out for a woman's needs, both physically and emotionally, will be trusted. When a woman sees a man put himself aside to serve her or her children she swells with love and security. It is the glue that holds her to her man. She will love him with fierce loyalty and adore him. When she can trust in his loyalty, protection and provision she is able to flourish and reach her God-given potential. She may be a mom, nurse, teacher or administrator, but she will be better at it if she feels secure with her man. When she can count on him she can blossom. I think God meant for this to happen so that his daughters could help him in his work. God created women as partners in His great work and he wants men to protect women so that they may fully perform the calling he has for them.
A woman will not trust a man simply because he wants her to. A woman's full trust and confidence can be very hard to earn and easily wounded. But she can also be generous in forgiving. Often this tendency results in men not taking her need seriously. The saying "it's easier to ask forgiveness than permission" is evidence that someone takes trust too lightly.
If she has any reason to doubt him, she will be held back, trying to protect herself. This is where men get confused. They see strange behavior and think it's just hard to figure out women. Pride will block them from examining the situation honestly. Men who did not have a good role model in a father will be confused. But if they look carefully they will see that there is some insecurity that she is trying to cover up, fulfill her own needs, or she is simply hurt and lashing out. Some girls are hurt early in their lives by their fathers and they are unable to trust a husband, or find it very difficult to trust a man. If she does finally give that trust and it is broken, she may never give it again. Men must be able to evaluate whether the woman is healthy enough for a relationship or he will forever be trying to earn her trust and never able to get it.
Unfortunately, many modern women are fooled into behavior that does not demand this trust from men. Popular culture teaches girls to be promiscuous and they get hurt by such behavior every time. Men learn to expect this from women and eventually they begin to demand it from those who resist, withholding love unless it is first bought by sexual favors. A woman will not trust such a man. This is how women damage themselves and other women. Women who take part in porn or make themselves porn by their dress and behavior are especially damaged and hopeless. In their despair, they do not realize that they are teaching men to abuse them as well as other women.
Women are also conditioned to think that happiness comes outside of the home, and many women are even convinced that if they are not contributing financially to the household that they are oppressed, almost slaves. Such a belief is rooted in insecurity and a misunderstanding of themselves. A woman, who does not trust her man to provide, will be driven to provide for herself. She will seek independence so that she will not be hurt. Many women are finding that this belief is exhausting and unfulfilling, a sort of self imposed slavery. It also attracts selfish males who want to transfer the burden of their role to the woman. He is more like a boy who wants his toys and weekly party night. Such males cannot be trusted and are not mature enough to be considered men.
A woman wants a man who is unselfish, strong, capable, loyal, self disciplined, self sacrificing, loving, worthy of her trust and consistent. In return a healthy woman will discover an intense and fierce love and loyalty to him. A man who has developed these qualities and has gained the trust of his wife will find his woman blossom into something he probably never imagined. And due to modern confusion, I don't think she will expect it either.
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